On trying new things and adjusting expectations

I’ve never been good at not being good at things as soon as I start them, so it’s no wonder it took me a year to start my Etsy shop. Business is one thing – it’s serious and nerve-racking – but when you’re this much of a perfectionist, hobbies are no different…

My mum mentioned a couple of weeks ago that she was going on a one-day embroidery workshop midway between Brum and hers, and as luck would have it I had already booked the day off work. I’ve been seriously burnt out lately between the day job, business and my health, so a day hanging out with my mum staring at threads sounded ideal. I’m not the most experienced embroiderer (satin stitch and back stitch were pretty much the only things in my embroidery arsenal before the class), but I naively thought I’d just be able to whip up a hoop full of art in 6 hours. Aww, bless past me…

So we were going to be embroidering landscapes, and the first thing to do was rub a  photo transfer onto the fabric. Cool, easy, no problem – oh wait, here comes the first failure. It took me FOREVER to get the bastard thing onto the cotton. I wanted to cry, because I’m a totally proportionate and reasonable person.

Anyway, according to Lorna (the lovely instructor), it was thicker paper than usual and not my fault. Don’t know if that’s true or if she was being nice, but I’m taking it! Eventually we ended up with this:

…which I picked because it looks like where I grew up:

So far, so difficult! I wasn’t not enjoying it, by the way, I was just frustrated with myself for not instantly being top of the class…

Luckily, the first new  stitch we learnt was split stitch, which is a bit like back stitch. Tree trunks started to appear in my bluebell wood (*cough* that’s what they said…):

We also learnt fly stitch, french knots and ‘lazy daisies’:

Despite enjoying the sewing itself, I was so much slower than everyone else in the class, and it was taking me an age to pick colours and get the hang of the new stitches. Other people were learning fancy stitches left, right and centre, and it was making me jealous. It was pretty obvious I was getting frustrated, so Lorna told me not to worry about what the others were doing, and just to keep going at my own pace. She was so nice and so not-patronising, which made a massive difference for me.

Once I had ‘permission’ to just focus on my own design, I was able to readjust my expectations and appreciate the multiple new stitches I’d learnt. I didn’t get nearly as much of the design done as I wanted to at the start of the day, but what I did do was ok:

Despite my frustration with myself, I really enjoyed the class, and it reaffirmed for me something I’ve been working on for a long time: adjusting expectations of myself. I’m not advising letting yourself off the hook and making excuses to be lazy, but sometimes being relentlessly hard on yourself is less productive than just accepting you might need to lower the bar a bit (who knew?!). It’s especially important if you’re feeling tired, ill or burnt out, because you’re probably already not at your best.

Aaaaand that’s why I’m currently not beating myself up (too much) for having melted a pendant I’d spent hours on today, and have given up my jewellery efforts for now to sit on the sofa and work on my embroidery instead…

If any of you are having trouble readjusting expectations today, this is your permission to go a bit easier on yourself. If you can’t do that, here are some pictures of my parents’ dog, Olive, in the bluebell woods at home to cheer you up:

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One thought on “On trying new things and adjusting expectations

  1. Pingback: New designs, old inspirations | Florence The Magpie

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